One Fish, Two Fish, Red Fish, Glue Fish

Jasons Phone 031113 136Justin came home with a new homework assignment last week. He was asked to choose a fish that he liked the best, create a diorama about that fish, and then do a short report. Keep in mind, he’s in Kindergarten!!! At this rate, I’m afraid to see what will be asked of him when he gets to 3rd Grade! (Will I be stealing plutonium from Libyan terrorists to help Justin power his Flux Capacitor??? I don’t know. It’s possible!)

This turned out to be a really great experiment for us! And by “us,” I mean GWE and me. (Justin’s assignment?? Not anymore!) GWE and I learned that while we usually do work well together, this could have ended badly. I want you to imagine two Type A personalities passively/aggressively “needling” one another on why, where, and how to glue a dead starfish to a shoebox! Our separate expectations of what the final assignment should look like and our differing opinions of what constituted “procrastination” may have led to some hurt feelings. But, the assignment was completed on time and we’re still married.

First, we needed to collect the items that would make up the diorama. Here is what we used:

1) a shoebox

2) duct tape

3) dental floss (mint, if you must know)

4) a sparkly blue backdrop from Michael’s Art Supplies

5) a collection of sparkly fish from Michael’s Art Supplies

6) Some sparkly seaweed and coral structures from Michael’s Art Supplies

7) A styrofoam shark from the bathtub

8) Dead, dried star fish from Michael’s Art Supplies

9) Colorful aquarium pebbles from Pet Co.

10) Sand from a playground. (I want you to imagine me driving up to a public playground, jumping out of my car while it is still running, “scampering” to the sandbox with a ziplock bag all the while almost knocking over a few kids to get to the “good sand,” quickly collecting handfuls of sand into the bag, and then running back to my car. If I had seen someone else do that, I would have grabbed my kids and then called the cops!)

GWE, Justin, and I began the assignment a week early, but then (not my fault) set it aside until 6pm the night before it was due. On Sunday night, we all took turns gluing, sticking, and “flossing” each item into place. When it was done, it was clear to me whose “vision” won out.

Jasons Phone 031113 128

Let me just say that Justin’s diorama is excellent. However, it does look like his fish belong on the Vegas Strip. There is more glitter in there than “Showgirls” and if you listen closely you can hear, “Please welcome to the stage – SHARKY and The SHARKETTES!!”

Justin also wrote a wonderful report. It is as follows:

Sharks eat little tiny foods.

They have sharp teeth.

Sharks are my favorite sea animal because they are totally awesome

A shark is bigger than a school bus.

I am incredibly proud of him and I have learned an important lesson from this assignment – my wife can find a way to put sparkles on anything!

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